Dodo Eggs

 Bedtime…Saul’s feet seem to drag across the floor.  It isn’t because he’s tired.  He doesn’t want to go to bed.  When your primary preoccupation is play, why expedite the process?  Every kid seems programmed to think that bedtime is some sort of punishment. 

 “We are all going to bed.”  I swear to him.  “No one is going to have ANY fun while you’re stuck in that soft, warm, blanket clad prison up there.”

 I’m lying of course, when the small children finally go to bed is when parents of these intensive little projects can finally enjoy themselves but he doesn’t need to know that.  About five minutes in and he’s usually asleep.

 Let’s back up…Bedtime…After brushing Saul’s teeth and changing him into his pajamas I take a seat in the living room chair and tell him to put his toys back into his box.  Saul picks up the nearest toy and dinks around with it.  I watch as he sloooooowly makes his way to toward putting it away.  He’s in no rush because he knows dad has patience to spare. 

 Melissa is sitting at the table plinking away at the computer.  A timer goes off in her head and she stands up.  Saul’s eyes widen they connect with Melissa’s glare.  Suddenly he moves as if someone lit a firecracker under his rear.  My wife begins walking toward the kitchen and Saul almost leaps out of her way (think Indiana Jones and the massive stone ball). 

 I can’t help myself – I laugh out loud.  Saul knew he was playing the stall game and with a simple look – Melissa ended it.  To see my little boy suddenly and hurriedly switch from reverse to fourth gear was the highlight of my day.  It was perfect theater.

 Melissa hears me laugh and stops.  “You see that’s how you get a little one to do what he’s told.  He knows I’m on to him.  It’s classic good cop / bad cop.”

 “No,” I reply.  “If you remember, there was a day last month when I was stuck with Saul the whole time.  And yes, by bedtime, I was the bad cop.  What you’re seeing here is the difference between someone who’s been dealing with little boy games all day and someone who’s been at work and is just enjoying spending time with the little man.”

Then I added, “I knew he was playing the stall game.  When I’m done playing, he will be too.  I’m just more interested in spending time with him than I am being a parent.  It’s called the grandparent syndrome.”

Melissa shakes her head, “Matt, my dear, you’re not a grandparent.”

• Saul’s Balls
• Great Moments in Parenting
• Don’t Worry. I Survived.
• Candy Land
• Dad’s A Goober Awareness Resource