Dodo Eggs

I’m standing beside my kitchen counter late one evening with an ugly pink slip on the counter.  It was the speeding ticket I’d earned a few weeks ago.   Unfortunately, I didn’t have proof of insurance with me so I would need to appear in court.  The coverage was there but the state trooper was unimpressed with my glove compartment full of expired insurance cards.  Waldo only knows what I did with my current card.

Our little boy had been asleep for a while and the only things to be heard was the refrigerator and the slight “shshship” sound of my wife cutting an apple.

“You know what,” I began.  “If I could go back in time and avoid this ticket, do you realize that I wouldn’t do it?  Something as precious as time and I wouldn’t accept getting some of it back because I don’t want to rework all those days.  I don’t want to rework all the problems.  What does that tell you about how much I’m enjoying life?”

“Not much I suppose.”  As my wife cut each portion of apple free, it would rock back and forth on the cutting board.

I turned to the calendar on the fridge behind me.  “I mean look, It’s another two solid weeks before my next break from school and even then I’ll still have to work at the pool so I really don’t get a whole lot of time off.  And after that I’ll be counting down the days until winter break!  I’m standing here wishing my entire life away!”

My wife finished cutting her apple and tossed the core into the sink.  A few seeds came loose and tinked a bit as they bounced off the side of our iron sink.  “It sounds to me like you don’t like your jobs.”

“Yes, but I think there’s more to it.  They say each day is a gift but I really have no excitement at all when I wake up in the morning.  I like going to bed more than getting up!”

Melissa took a bite from her apple and gave me a sultry look.  “Here’s what you need to do.  Surprise me tomorrow without spending a lot of money.  Start thinking of something starting now.  I look forward to finding out what it is.”

“Wait, I was talking about a vacation not putting something else on my plate!”

“Just try it.”

I thought about my assignment the rest of the evening and came up with an idea right before sinking into sleep.  It was an exciting idea.  Already, I was distracted from my muddy thoughts. 

Most of the next day was spent thinking thorough my idea and sketching it down on paper.  By the time I arrived home, it was finished and for the first time in a while I felt excited about something.

I had written a letter to Penthouse regarding the last time Melissa and I spent quality time together.  There was a bit of fictitious flourish and the way I abused adjectives and adverbs was brutal.  The envelope was delivered with a bit too much of her favorite cologne and all the pomp I could muster.  We spent most of the evening laughing over it.

“So how was your day?”  Melissa had finished cutting another apple and was in the spice cabinet pushing a few things aside.

“You know what?  I had a better day.  I suppose I was just excited to get home.”

She pulled out the sugar and sprinkled a little over one of her apple slices.  Without warning, she popped it into my mouth.  The taste was overwhelming.

“Sounds to me like you just needed to sweeten things up a bit.”

• Scent to Hades
• Shopping On A White Horse
• Chemical Warfare
• Redirected Proposal
• Breach of Trust