Five Powerful Gods
Near the dawn of time, five separate gods were born to aid of people. These mighty deities were Wood, Fire, Earth, Water, and Plastic. The foundations of the sky warped at their presence and thunder paled to their footsteps. These gods were powerful but also extremely jealous and fought continually for the affection of the planet’s human population.
Each god provided his most useful aids to men, and each village choose to worship the deity whose contribution they saw as the most useful. Wood was an early favorite because of its versatility. Water’s properties wooed many followers as well.
Not long after the four other gods had staked their claims, Plastic decided to make his presence known. A fisherman returned to his wooden canoe, and found it replaced by a beautiful, pink, plastic kiak.
It was not long before Plastic was the most highly favored amongst men. His wares did not give themselves to rot like those of Wood. Plastic’s gifts held Water’s in check, and were not as cumbersome as Earth’s. Fire’s contributions were far too dangerous to be used lightly. Thus, Plastic was worshiped through out the land. Many children were named Plasta in honor of man’s benefactor.
The other gods found this trend alarming, and they plotted his undoing. “We must rid ourselves of Plastic’s absorbing influence!” warned Earth.
Plastic soon learned of his peers’ dissatisfaction. In order to make peace, he offered to have his humans sacrifice twelve beautiful virgins. The gesture was panned by the other dieties and the issue became bound for confrontation.
On a cool spring morning, the forces of mankind assembled to assist their patron god. They were clad in flexible breastplates, safety goggles, and fitted mouthpieces. Plastic took his place above the throng.
Wood, Fire, Earth, and Water swooped in from each of the four directions, and threatened to crush the forces of Plastic. The thought of life without plastic’s versatility rallied the humans to withstand the onrush of gods. Plastic also utilized his powers to pile conveniences, accessories, and shatter-proof containers in the path of the attacking gods.
It seemed that Plastic would remain king to the gods, when disaster struck. Fire threw his hottest bolts into the bosom of Plastic. This action created such a terrible stench that many of the human warriors were forced to scatter.
Without his human support Plastic was forced to admit defeat. He fled, and it was thought that his presence would never be known again. While he was in hiding, Plastic was actually gathering strength, and allies. Recently, he has burst upon an unsuspecting world with the assistance of his sons Vinyl, Latex, and Styrofoam. Plastic has brought lower his former rivals, and has reclaimed his rightful place of preeminence.
September 22nd, 2008 at 8:04 am
This is one of the most clever stories I’ve read in awhile.
September 23rd, 2008 at 9:33 am
this was well-thought out… i could just imagine the smell of burning plastic. ugh
September 24th, 2008 at 6:31 am
Good story matt!